I am really enjoying college right now - not in the sense that most people enjoy college - I'm not out partying all the time, believe me. But I love my classes - every single one of them. I never really had that experience the last time around, because I could never decide on a major. And I can tell you that I never once even considered history, it wasn't until later, after I had completely lost my way, that I was able to find individuation.
It's a real word. It isn't the same thing as individuality, which is more closely related to a person's identity; individuation is the process by which a person becomes themselves. The series of obstacles that you have to overcome that change you from the person you were into the person that you are. (I learned that in college - hi, Mom!)
Anyway, my classes are amazing. Latin is such a passion, in the strangest way, it's gloriously frustrating. It fascinates me in a way that no other subject has, but at times it is so frustrating because I have all the pieces but can't put them together. It's even better than I remember.
I'm finally taking the American History class that I've always wanted and I have never been so excited to write a paper as I am for this class. I've had my topic chosen for over a week and tomorrow I'm going to start reading about it.
My War in the Ancient Worlds class is bittersweet; my professor is an amazing storyteller, and I've already had to ask for further reading because some of the things we've discussed were so interesting. On the other hand, though, it makes me long for the Sunday nights spent crammed around a crowded table with the sound of dice rolling around. It makes my heart ache, in a way that I'm never sure how to explain.
Ancient Mythology is something that is unlike any class I've ever had before. It is literally a man on stage in front of one hundred students telling us stories that are older than we could ever imagine, and it's really interesting, but it's so weird. And we are always talking about sex. And it isn't just because there is a lot of sex in the stories (and there really, really is) but the discussions in this class always seem to lead there. On the first day of class, the professor said, "My goal in this class is to teach you about mythology, sure, but I also want to make you look smart, so you can impress the right people and get ahead in life. Oh, and to get you laid." Everyone laughed and obviously he was joking, I just want to give you an idea of what that class is like.
And they're all a lot of reading. So much reading. But I love it, and most of the time it's really pleasant to just sit and read, with the exception of one of my textbooks which is dreadfully written and can be a real struggle to get through.
So I haven't been keeping up with writing, between the reading & workload, not getting nearly enough sleep because of a mattress that I am pretty sure is older than I am, calling my boyfriend at every opportunity, and missing my dog like crazy. And driving, and weddings, and engagement parties. Whenever I have a free minute, all I want to do is sleep. Just curl up with David and Phoebe and sleep.
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